A LIFE CHANGED continued, part 7, chapter 78

“The day after my roommate (and her accomplice) was expelled, I arrived at my first morning class and our professor made a special point that the topic of the class was changed to discuss “the obligation we have to obey our spiritual leaders” and that if we know something that “they” consider to be untoward, we are “under God” required to talk. Really, so a mere mortal of a man had the right to judge what was right and what was wrong in the eyes of God. In my second class of the morning, the professor had a similar message and I was beginning to wonder what was going on here. I was so naïve.

“By the time I arrived at chapel at 10:00 a.m. (or thereabouts) – the speaker had been changed out and the President was going to address the student body. I was feeling very uncomfortable, but didn’t really know why. I was confident that I had done the right thing. Bravely, I listened and what followed was a painful crucifixion for me. Too many years have passed for me to accurately remember his entire message, but I do remember him saying: “two students have been expelled today and there is one among us who knows something that they are not prepared to share – this is sin.” He then went on to say that if his son ever did anything that was considered (obviously in his books) a sin, then each of us (the entire student body) had an obligation to tell him. My mind went blank. I was feeling very dizzy. I was being centered out, in front of the entire student body, as someone who had “failed miserably before the eyes of God” and “through the eyes of these spiritual leaders”. To be misunderstood is a very difficult hurdle to overcome. Everyone has his or her own interpretation of the “understanding” and therefore it is a very difficult healing process for the one misunderstood.

“At this point, I froze in my seat. I knew the message was for me. I was hot all over. What was I going to do? I was stunned at what I heard. Being a fairly intuitive individual, I was stunned that I had heard basically the same message all morning and didn’t even connect the dots. These “men of God” were absolutely bombarding me. I felt like it was a lynching. I really don’t know what happened next, but I do remember people getting up and leaving the chapel while the President was talking. I remember one couple (women sat on the right; men on the left) – each of which stood up and walked to the center of the aisle and held hands as they made their exit. This behavior was clearly a defiant and sad statement on the broken human spirit. As I recall, nobody spoke to me after chapel. Or maybe I just rejected any approach. I just cannot remember.

“I went home right after chapel. My Father and Mother were living in Regina at the time. We talked, cried and hugged – supporting one another. They listened very thoughtfully.  Little did I realize what was about to change. My spirit is good today because of my parents. But back then my life was destroyed. My innocence gone. I didn’t realize to what extent until after I was expelled.

“The inappropriate use of “spiritual” power exerted by these so-called “spiritual leaders” on me personally and others collectively are written in a book by a power greater than myself. It was a very dark time.

“So…when I saw my Father come through the door, behind which the Student Life Committee sat, he touched my shoulder for the second time and said:  “We’re going home”. I had been expelled.   Mom had my bedroom set up so nicely with my favorite food – licorice – in a bowl on the dresser. Today, as a parent, I can more fully understand how they must have suffered to see my pain and feel theirs at the same time. They knew much more than I will ever know about what was really going on behind closed doors at CBC that year.

“I left CBC with a broken spirit and had it not been for the support I received from my Father and Mother I would not be where I am today. I have traveled a very rough and rocky road with lots of twists and turns, but I have a renewed spirit today that is continuing to seek higher spiritual ground.

“I learned that the gentle touch of someone that loves and cares for you is the greatest gift one can ever receive.”  

The End.

The chapel experience hit many people the same way. Each felt the message was directly specifically at them. The irritation and anger was palatable. You could feel it and it became the focus of late night discussion and debate about this new definition of sin. Personally, I felt like the Gestapo had invaded the campus.