IN HER OWN WORDS chapter 88

THE STORY OF OUR ROMANCE

 It was at Canadian Bible College in Regina we met. It all began when we worked on the school executive together. We were both put on the Social Committee and we found we worked quite well together socially. Our first date was to a Barn Party at Halloween (a good time for a date). We really didn’t see much of each other that night, but it was a night to remember. After this we began dating quite often (if you can say that at CBC with our two hour SP (social privilege) each week.

That summer we were apart, but on September 4, 1964 was set-aside for our engagement. After this we went back to CBC and spent good times together learning to know and love one another more each day. It was a hard and very long year but we spent many interesting dates at Tuck Shop and spending our 5¢ a week (on red licorice).

OUR ENGAGEMENT

It was a Friday night on September 4, 1964. Clyde had come from Omaha and Doug Hollands and Merla McKee came with him from Regina. That night after being apart for about four months we had much to talk about and went for a walk. We walked down to Coronation park – a lovely evening. Clyde wanted to sit down on a bench near a street light but that wasn’t what I had in mind. I told him of a real nice bench with no glaring lights nearby. As we seated ourselves comfortably, Clyde pulled something out of his pocket and gave it to me, I felt around (it was dark) and discovered it was a little trophy cup with “To The Best Sweetheart) engraved on it. A little later he pulled out another little package and you can guess — an engagement ring! I had to run to the nearest streetlight to see it. It was beautiful and just fit. We walked home to show my mom and Merla our treasure.

We were engaged a year and nine months, but this was a wonderful experience and a joy.

A broader explanation of our story can be found in chapters 80-81.

DELLA’S FAMILY TREE

 Della was raised by her grandmother who she called mom her whole life. 

Her birth mother was called her sister. Both were terrific women.

CLYDE’S FAMILY TREE

PLANNING THE WEDDING chapter 87

We had talked often about the wedding and several plans were already made. The invitations had been ordered and Rev. Rose was coming to officiate. We also asked the present pastor at Red Deer Alliance to assist and his wife was to be the organist. Of course, it was going to be at Red Deer Alliance Church with the reception in the basement. The reception would be a tight squeeze, but it would work.

Money was very tight so we geared up to do all we could to keep the costs down. Della’s mom was making the wedding cake – one of them. Who ever heard of fruitcake being used as a wedding cake? I hated fruitcake. I knew it was traditional, but the thought gagged me. I hated to be rude and did make my comments in a gentler manner than I am currently writing. We also had a white cake. I guess that wasn’t unheard of.

We also went shopping for items for our gift registry. Picking china was not an American custom, but I loved the idea. It fit Della perfectly. I don’t know if she knew it yet, but she clearly had the gift of hospitality and it was often at work in our home. We also talked about furniture since the only thing we owned was a teak cabinet radio and record player. Della bought it with her job money. At the moment we didn’t know where we be going or where we would live. That put several things on hold.

This was my first commissioned
colored pencil drawing. Della
wanted a place setting of her china.

We picked Wild Alberta Rose, a Royal Albert pattern, for our china. 1966 was the 100^th anniversary of Alberta and it was the provincial flower. I remember that a cup and saucer was $4:99 at Eaton’s. The Bay didn’t have the Te Royal Albert pattern yet.  I know we picked a few others things, but I don’t know what they were.

I stayed in the upstairs bedroom at Della’s moms until we found our first apartment. It was a small fully furnished basement of a house in west Red Deer. It had the worst bed possible. A lumpy mattress lying on very saggy springs. The kitchen was so tiny you had to get up from the table to open the fridge door. You had to laugh. But it was going to be our starting point.

Anna Jean and Kathy

We went to a church wide couple’s shower. Never heard of that before either. Anna Jean Gifford and Kathy Smith were our hostesses. Several strange practices were coming up everywhere. We played several traditional “shower” games. There was a contest of some sort where people were dressed in newspaper held together with pins and tape. Both men and women were decorated. One man was  Jean and another was myself. That was to be expected I guess. It was all very weird, but funny. Our love story was presented in a scrapbook (two pages below) and several word games. Ron and Joan sang and there were plenty of gifts, mostly kitchen related items. We would have things to cook and eat on.I just remember a lot of people being there.

Opening the many gifts

Ron and Joan singing, Ethel at the
piano and Anna Jean in front

It seems to be that Della was the first to be married in a host of very close friends, many who would marry the following year. She was also a very special girl in that church. I was stealing their pride and joy. It felt like the whole church turned out to everything that had anything to do with out wedding. Della was clearly the star.

There was a tradition of playing tricks on the bride and groom on the wedding night and we had heard a rumor that something might be done to my car so it would not run. To avoid this potential problem, we walked the neighborhood looking for a garage we might rent for a week. We found on about half a block from Mom’s house. An older couple that gave us the use of their garage for a week after hearing our story owned it. It was inconvenient, but it beat no having a car for our honeymoon.

There were other rumors as to what might happen and we did everything we could to avert what we suspected. When we learned the source of these plans, we were surprised. The CBC president’s oldest son was behind most of this. This was somewhat surprising, as we barely knew him and he were not invited to the wedding. Somehow we doubted he would show, but could not take the chance.

Everything was ready at thins point. The real work began a couple days before the wedding. We had plans to decorate the reception and church ourselves with hand made items.

Thank you for coming and thank you for the gift.
Della insisted we greet every guest. Here we are talking to Mrs. Goetz.
This must have been my favorite sweater. I'm wearing it in nearly every photo.

THE LICENSEING COMMITTEE ON ATTACK chapter 86

     The year had gone well and the turmoil of the previous year had dissipated. I was actively studying for my interview with the Licensing Committee as were most seniors planning on the ministry. I was clearly stressed about going into a room alone with a group of 8-10 men focused exclusively on asking who knows what and me trying to remain calm enough to answer confidently.

The interview was scheduled to last 50 minutes and would be divided into two parts. One, my conversion and present walk with God and two, my theology. I had been told most of the time would be on theology. Since I had always struggled with tests of any kind, I had a hard time focusing on the theology part and was studying hard to pound it into my head.

My interview was schedule for the first one after supper. Needless to say, I could not eat. But neither could I study. I was never able to cram right up to the last minute. That only made matters worse for me. As I recall, the meeting was in the boardroom off the president’s office. I remember some of the men present, but not the entire make-up. The group was the Licensing Committee from The Canadian Midwest District. Mr. Rose was there as the dean. That was a comfort. I believed he was on my side.

The basic question of my conversion started the meeting. Rather than moving on to my present walk with God, a district pastor wanted to know about my lack of submission to authority and what possessed me to attack authority. I was so taken back I became visibly nervous. I was shaking and sweat began to pour down my forehead. I began to ramble only making matters worse. I attempted to defend myself and explain my right to do what I did.

Mr. Rose ended that question when he attempted to move the subject back to my theology where it should have been. Describe what conversion means? I handled that question well. It turned out to be the only theological question I was asked.

A second pastor turned it back to the pervious year and that continued for the entire, extended interview. The only interest the committee seemed to have was to destroy me for the events of the previous year. Mr. Rose pressured them to release me so the next interview could begin. I was there for one hour and ten minutes. I was exhausted when I left and absolutely convinced it was over. I would never be accepted into ministry.

Yes, I was angry. I doubted anyone had ever faced an interview like that. I could see a kind face, but he was clearly frustrated and could not seem to redirect the focus. Neither could I. I went to my room, cried and blamed God for all that had and was happening. I felt deserted. I felt hung out to dry in the cold Saskatchewan winter air. I cried, I beat on my pillow; I refused to answer the door. Only Garth had the courage to just walk in. I told him what had happened and that I hated every one of those jerks. I agreed with me because he didn’t want to argue. Mostly I was frightened, as I did not know what I was going to do. I believed God had called me to ministry and was now sure the doors had slammed shut in my face. I felt like the 95 pound weakling having sand kicked in his face.

At about 10:00 that evening as I was still sitting with Garth staring out at Fourth Avenue once again with envy for the freedom I believed those people had. There was a knock at my door. Rev. Rose and Rev. Orthner came in and sat on the beds. Garth excused himself. They apologized for what had happened in the meeting. Rev. Orthner was the district Superintendent of the Canadian Midwest District. He made my day.

“I believe you did the right thing in standing up to the dean. I like a guy with courage and guts. I know what most of those people think about you, but I don’t agree and I am going to do everything I can to find a place for you to begin ministry. But I’m going to tell you this; you will have to take whatever comes along. You will not have the option of choosing or waiting for a better option. You will need to get your foot in the door and prove to them that you are God’s man.”

As it turned out, he kicked a door open for me. I had written to the DS from Eastern Canada and he said there was nothing for me. At least that was clear. He had open churches and I was trying to get into the pastorate. But he was not going to place me. I wrote to my DS in the Western District of the USA. That was my home district. He never answered my letter. I went to Calgary to meet with the DS of the Western District and he told me he had no open churches. I wish he had added there were none for me as there were two open churches at the time. Students talk to one another. The wording hurt.

But like I said. Rev. Orthner found the hole for me to crawl through. But that’s a future story, but I did end up in Saskatoon, Saskatchewan at the largest church in the district.

I remember very little about graduation. The Committee meeting pretty well did me in. I know my parents did not come. They were planning on being at my wedding a few weeks later. I think Della came, but I’m not even sure of that. I was relieved that the Licensing Committee granted me a license to minister. I suspect I am one of the few, if not the only one approved for ministry having been asked only one theological question and none about his current walk with God. All I know is that God had to be in it.

Don Kinnie and myself getting ready for the big event. My parents wanted to be there as I was the their only child to graduate from college.

IT WASN'T ALL STUDIES chapter 85

The Saskatchewan winter arrived early the September of 1965. It was snowing for our fall kick off picnic. Since boots and winter coats seem strange a picnic and it felt like we were going to be in a very long and cold winter the event moved inside. Snow in October is not unheard of, but for early September it was discouraging. Maybe it would thaw out by graduation.

As usual the year was filled with skits. Seniors imitated freshmen, freshmen imitated seniors and Marilyn Friesen imitated Miss Shattuck. She was always dead on with her interpretation.

As usual, the social committee put together a great year and kept up the tradition of cinnamon toast and hot chocolate for Saturday nights. The fall party was a great event. There was a faculty band at the Halloween carnival. Unfortunately Mrs. Rose struggled to clang the cymbals in time with the music. Maybe it was intentional. It was very funny. The barbershop quartet of Bob, Brian, Dave and Jim entertained.

This next event I blame on Doug, my roommate from the first year. He would show up on campus from time to time and this time I met him at the mailboxes. He had just changed his car license plates and gave one to me. I didn’t want it and stuffed it in Laurel’s mailbox. As far as I was concerned that was the end of the matter. The plate began to make the rounds. It first reappeared in my bedroom pillowcase. I put it back in Shirley’s room. It helps to be the night watchman. I found it in a winter coat pocket. I packaged it and mailed it to the girls. This went on and on until on my birthday it appeared baked in a cake. This continued to the end of the school year when I cut it into three parts and disturbed it so each of the girls would have a keepsake, I hoped.

Shirley was in our wedding party and she placed her third in my honeymoon luggage. Doug was my best man and I once again hold him totally responsible. It was a totally fun and harmless running joke to see who could return it the most creatively. The girls won. The cake and the luggage were the absolute best. I threw the last piece away. Too bad, it would make a great photo.

There was a tradition regarding the year-end banquet that the juniors put on for the seniors each year. The entire event other than the date was to be completely hush-hush deal until the night it happened. Juniors snuck around to pull off the banquet and seniors did everything they could to find out everything.

Determining most of the planning committee was the easy part. They all looked sneaky and guilty. The goal was finding out where it would be held, the speaker, the program, the menu, the decorations and any other details. We would discover what we could and present the information to the juniors at the banquet. Garth and I made it our personal goal to learn all we could. We became very adept at searching a room for information with the resident present. We would position ourselves or either side of the suspect and while one was talking the other went through whatever files, books, paper, or drawers he could. There were times we had to go back several times. We had decided that sneaking into a room when no one was there was unfair. This had to be up front.

When we finally determined the location the rest was also easy. We went to the host restaurant where I volunteered to work in the kitchen area for the afternoon just so we could be spies and get whatever we needed. That I did. That afternoon, I picked up programs, napkins, samples of decorations, everything we needed. Just to be safe, we gave the notebook to the chairperson of the banquet before we left for the banquet.

Della instructed me to take her former roommate to the banquet. I had a wonderful time with Shirley.

I you remember the names of any people I have missed or if I have the names wrong, please let me know.

STAYING INVOLVED chapter 84

I returned for my senior year in the fall 0f 1965. I never considered transferring to another school. I knew some changes were coming. I was excited. Mr. and Mrs. Rose came on staff as the new dean of students/men and dean of women. I thought it was perfect.

Della remained in Red Deer and continued to work for Alberta Governments Telephones. She had one semester to complete to graduate but it wasn’t until the third semester. She decided she would wait until then to make a decision about returning.

I had some trepidation about returning. I expected some residual emotions to linger and some hostility to be directed my way. There was some, but it was minor. I was once again roomed on the third floor. This time I roomed directly across from the restroom. Larry was my roommate. He was a tall redhead from Spokane, Washington. By third semester my depression was beginning to overwhelm me and I asked for a room alone. One became available and Mr. Rose let me have it. It was still on third floor and at the end of the hall. There was no traffic past my room.

I still loved the year, but missed Della terribly. Her job provided fringe benefits that few had. When she worked a late night shift she was the only operator on duty. I could call directory assistance and she would answer. We had a great number of conversations after most were in bed.

That was a problem at times. I was killing the clock at both ends. My gratis (the job I did for the school) was as morning watchman. That meant I got up at 5:30 am, went around and unlocked the building and turned the heat up. It was always dark when I began my rounds. One morning I was leaving the boys dorm and just stepping from the building into the covered airlock, when my flashlight caught the feet of someone hiding in the entrance. I almost went through the roof. Mike, a freshman student, had left the dorm to go to the administration building to type and found himself locked out. He was waiting for someone to come by who could let him in.

I was involved in the South American Prayer Band and helped produce a Friday night Mission Meeting for our group. I wrote my first full-length play entitled “Columbia in Revolt.” The story was a debate between rebels, missionaries and news people on the conflicts in South America. I was set in a TV station. Part of our task was to include everyone in the pray band in the program. We did that just fine. A partial set and props were built. Props we gathered, costumes put together and actors were needed. I loved stretching my wings beyond a skit.

I was also very involved in Youth Conference and clearly did a skit or two. I may have done some with Dave. I’m not sure. I found this photo in the yearbook of me in a classic pose from a skit Franklin and I would have done when I was a freshman. It had to be a three stooges style skit. You can tell by the paper and plastic on the wall. I guess I must have liked cleaning up messes. It seems I did several skits that produced the mess.

The nurses also lead a Missions Meeting and I made a poster for them. I had read an article about folding paper to create designs and tried it for this project. It was very unique and very time consuming. It is the only one of its kind I ever did.

There was a sales competition between classes and Jean (Anna) and I were team leaders for the senior class. I thing we were selling yearbooks. Don’t hold me to it. Our slogan was “I’m a spy for the SSI.” For the life of me I cannot remember what SSI stood for. Our group name was “Oldtimers.” The photo was of my interrogation of Jean while Bill is the judge in the background. I’m realty letting her have it, but don’t remember why? I was hoping Jean would be my memory here, but haven’t been able to reach her. If anyone remembers what this event was all about, please comment.

I had to include the snowman for my none Canadian readers anything built with snow is rare in Regina. The snow was too  dry and flakey. It just didn't stick together, therefore very few snowball fights. Looks like Harold and Eric working away on the snowman.

MEETING MY FAMILY chapter 83

Most people have a hard time meeting the family of the person they want to marry. That is especially so if you have developed a relationship apart from interaction from those families. Della and I knew each other pretty well before either of us met the family of the other.

I had the advantage of knowing some of Della’s friends and a former pastor before meeting any of her family. Of course I knew them through her, but that isn’t exactly the same.

We worry less about whom they are than how they will respond to us. Will they like us, will they accept us, and will they approve of us? Add to that the little idiosyncrasies of our family that we know and cannot really explain. Then there are things we live with that become normal to us, but are certainly not normal to the one we want to introduce.

By the time we had reached Omaha, I had given up being embarrassed by the place where we lived and accepted my family as they were. My only hope was that Della could do the same. My family is not verbally demonstrative. Only David can really initiate and carry on a conversation with someone he just met. He did not live in Omaha and I did not know who all would come around.

Dean, my younger brother, had married while I was at college that first semester. He now lived in Council Bluffs and had two children (I thought). I had met his wife, but really knew nothing about them. Would he come over?

Doris and her family lived in Nebraska City and she and her family would likely come by. I had always gotten along with her. I enjoyed all her. Gladys and her three kids would come by. Her husband was stationed at Offutt Air Force Base and was certainly and easy guy to talk to. Dorlis was in Florida and we would not see her.

There was some preconceived tension about our reception. I was clearly heading toward the ministry and I did not know what to expect. Would our reception be somewhat strained? A sibling going into the ministry was weird.

The meeting was cordial if not warm. I do not now remember exactly who came by. My parents were receptive toward Della. Mom, never found it easy around strangers, but dad welcomed her to the family.

The trip to Omaha was planned so I would be the best man in Al’s wedding. I was thrilled to be included. I considered him my very best friend and I have always thought the world of Bev. Why else would I have dated her (just had to squeeze that in there)? And since my plans were to marry a Canadian I did wonder how often our paths would cross in the future.

The wedding was on August 13^th, a Friday, at the Tabernacle. From the outside it looked more like a warehouse than a church. It had this little theater marquee handing over the front door with the name and it was right at the street – no lawn in front. The roof was curved like a Quonset hut, but the inside was large and comfortable. It would seat about a thousand and was the only church I knew that was air conditioned in the ‘50’s. It has a sloped floor and no center aisle for the bride to enter. I thought they should have laid boards over the back of the pews so the bride could walk down the center. That didn’t happen. Rev. Gordon Wishart was the officiating pastor. Al said, “I am glad you kept me from backing out on the marriage thing and Bev has kept a short leash on me from day one.” That’s a joke. You could not have stopped those two from getting married. I love ‘em both.

The Omaha Gospel Tabernacle was founded in 1921 and pastored by Rev. R. R. Brown. He established the church as part of the C&MA. Services were held west of 20th and Douglas St. In 1923, Dr. Brown began a radio broadcast of the first ever-nondenominational religious services. By 1933, Radio Chapel Service had a weekly national audience of more than 500,000. The broadcast continued for the next 53 years, becoming the longest continuous radio program on any one station in the world.

I first met Rev. Wishart the summer before when I went to his office to ask if he would baptize me. I wanted to be baptized at the Tabernacle. I knew the bulk of his ministry had been in Canada and he had spoke at CBC the year before where we first met. He had a very interesting take on following the founding pastor of a church he had served 53 years. He told me he would only be there a couple of years. His job was to transition the church toward a permanent pastor. Rev. Brown took no salary from the Tabernacle (the radio program paid his salary) and he owned his own home. So there was a big financial transition the church was making and some leaders were struggling with the new additional financial burdens. I believe he helped pave the way for a great future for what has become Christ Community Church in Omaha.

This is the front of the Tabernacle before the Marquee was added.

I have no idea what Dr. Brown is digging as that was the street when I attended.

BEGINNING TO LIVE AT RED DEER chapter 82

Leroy, Della’s brother got me a job with Alpha Dairy. He was working a milk route for them and set me up for their summer resort runs. It was the prefect summer job. It began with the Victoria Day weekend and ended Labor Day. I loved the timing as well. I came to work about 9:00 to meet with big Henry Singer, my supervisor. He did everything he could to try and rattle me by being just plain crude and rude. Somehow I survived him and we seemed to get along rather well.

Each morning I called the various resorts on my route for the day, placed their order with our plant, loaded up the tiny Alpha Dairy Econoline van and went for a ride. I mostly delivered ice cream mix in five and eight gallon cans – 40 and 80 pounds each. Sometimes I took them some other odds and ends like milk, cream, butter, etc. I serviced places like Pine Lake - a beautiful and peaceful lake where I delivered to two resorts, Sylvan Lake - sometimes I stopped at every little ice cream, hamburger, and snack stand on the highway, It was the busiest location. Also I drove to Bentley, Lacombe. Rimby (only once), and occasionally out to a Seventh Day Adventist college at Ponoka County where they made their own ice cream flavors. I just took them the mix. I remember they made terrific flavors, but you could not buy them anywhere.

I would have to man handle those awkward mix cans into some of the tightest squeezes behind counters, into storage rooms and fridges that would barely hold the cans. Sometimes I loaded their dispensers and at times helped them with other small tasks. All the places seemed to be small struggling outfits run by women. If there were men around, I never saw them – except at the Adventist College.

I rented a room from the Alexander’s up on South Hill. Actually I rented half a double bed. The other half was rented to another guy whom I cannot remember. I know this sounds strange to you youngens’ but it was fairly normal at the time. He left for work before I got up and was in bed before I got home. The Alexander’s were very nice to me. With the room I got meals. They served a great breakfast, packed lunch for work and would serve supper if I let them know I would be home before leaving for work. I rarely ate supper with them.

One morning as I was getting ready to come out for breakfast and over heard the Alexander’s discussing my grooming habits. She said, “I don’t understand why those boys have to shower everyday?” “Would you rather they were dirty/”  “No silly.” Then it sounded like a little kiss. Good people adjusting to a cleaner culture.

Della had the tiny three-room apartment above her mother’s home. She got a job as a telephone operator with Alberta Government Telephones. When her schedule worked out we had supper with her mother or she made supper. She was so nervous cooking for me feeling like she would never be as good as my mother. When she first told me that I nearly died laughing. She had to actually visit my home to understand how really funny that comment was. My mother would get up early in the morning to put the green beans on to cook for supper. By the time supper came they were good and dead. I am one of the few students who thought the food at college was good. I didn’t know what everyone was complaining about. Go figure. Della never once made a bad meal. I kept telling her it was one of her gifts. She could never see it, but I could always taste it.

The biggest deal of the summer was a visit to Omaha to meet my family. The trip was planned so I could be in my buddy Al’s wedding. I felt like I had to go just to make sure he married Bev.

We traveled down though Yellowstone National Park where together we bought the very first item for our future home. I still have it. It is a ceramic bear with a trout in its mouth. It was a cheap little ornament that now is one of the more precious items I have. We always left it sitting on an end table and both kids played with it and even dropped it a few times. Somehow it never broke nor was even chipped. Now I’ll be afraid to touch it thinking I will break it for sure.

Somewhere east of Yellowstone we stopped for lunch at a log cabin café sitting along a quiet little stream. They had trout on the menu and so Della ordered the fish. I probably got a hamburger. I know I had not eaten fish at all before that time. When served, the entire fish was plated with the scales still on and one eye looking right up at her. She starred at it for the longest time before I realized she was not going to eat that fish. She absolutely hated returning anything. We argued about sending it back. She was not going to do that even though she was expecting to get it filleted minus scales, bones and the eyes. She picked at it until the waitress came by and asked if there was something wrong. I immediately told her this was not what my girlfriend was expecting. “Let me get you something else.” Della was so embarrassed so instead of asking what she wanted I ordered her a hamburger. At least I knew she would eat that. “I would have eaten it!” “I know you would but you would also like the hamburger better.”

We went on through the rest o Wyoming, the corner of Colorado and crossed western Nebraska. That state looks a lot like Saskatchewan with more hills and trees, but just as boring. Finally we arrived in Omaha.